Cruel and Unusual Punishment

Yesterday, Gary came home and announced that it was the most difficult physical workout day that they've had yet. He didn't go into a lot of detail, but mentioned drills involving lots of sprinting and squatting. He came in the front door hobbling like a 90-year-old and was literally too exhuasted to even talk about it. That was "leg day" and today is "arm day." The sergeant told the class that someone WOULD cry on arm day. Apparently, it's going to be that tough! Gary can write with details later in the week, when he regains use of his limbs.

Ironic that this week Gary's class is learning about law and the consitutution, because he got a dose of "cruel and unsual punishment" delivered to him by his sergeant. On Monday (before leg exhaustion day), the sergeant advised everyone to go home and feast on a large pasta dinner. This is a typical routine for runners before a big race, so Gary did not think to question the advice. When they arrived on Tuesday, he asked, by show of hands, how many had followed his advice and eaten a pasta dinner. A handful of dutiful do-gooders raised their hands (Gary included). The sergeant then advised that eating pasta is the worst thing you can do before a day of sprinting (opposite of distance running). Some chemical reaction occurs and goes straight to your joints and causes a lot of undue pain. So much for following instructions!

Gary is now known as the class bookworm. After a few hours of lecture in criminal law, a young guy was getting stuff out of his locker when he non-chalantly mumbled, "geez, is anyone understanding this stuff?" When he looked up to see it was Gary who was standing next to him, he said, "Oh, well I KNOW you understand it" and went to find someone else to comiserate with.

In another instance, a few people were discussing some topic for which they didn't have the answer and one girl said, "Why don't you ask Gary. Apparently, he knows everything." It was said in good fun, (he hopes).

The last, and my favorite instance, happened yesterday. The class was broken into small groups. They then watched a video of an arrest that involved an illegal search (going into someone's trunk without a search warrant). Their assignment was to play the part of the prosecutor and come up with a rationale for why the search was legal. A woman in the group kept insisting that various things in the video were done incorrectly (e.g. "he parked his car sideways; you're not supposed to do that"). Gary was delicately trying to tell her that was irrelevant, but she couldn't resist the urge to point out discrepancies in the video. Finally, one guy couldn't take it anymore and menacingly yelled, "LISTEN TO GARY!" It's nice to know that Gary has that "EF Hutton" esque reputation!

Look for more on "leg and arm day" later in the week...